Wednesday, May 21, 2008

Katee & Spanker News Updates

POSTED BY: MaxiSpank
Howdy, here is some Katee news & site updates and other useless information...
Fats and DJ have posted the results of the TeamSpank Starbuck Awards. This is essential reading and you must not venture away from this site until you have read every syllable.

This week, we also have the startlingly tragic news that Katee has apparently blown out her Kimmel appearance for Friday night. Tsk, tsk, tsk. Katee, just so you know, you have broken one of your Spankers' hearts. StarbuckLoveSpank was all set to attend - had her tickets in her greasy, sweaty, grubby little hands - until you had to go and rain on her parade. Don't feel too guilty though Katee - she might pull through. She might get over it eventually, with a lot of love and care (and outrageously expensive councelling).

In an effort to buck Starby up, Katee, some of us suggested that she fly cross country to attend your (somewhat bizarre sounding) Wizard do next weekend. Much to our horror, she decided that was a great idea and now she's gone and bought her plane ticket. She is quite hard up for cash, and she apparently had to break into the piggybank she's had since she was 3. Katee, just so you know, if you blow out that appearance as well, you are going to have BLOOD ON YOUR HANDS. Starby will be inconsolable and you are going to leave one hell of a mess to clean up. Not that we want you to feel responsible or anything (for Starby's probable forthcoming suicide attempt). No pressure, Katee. BTW, the Wizard World advertising team would probably start practicing self-mutilation if you don't show up, also, as they seem to have based their entire advertising campaign around you. No pressure.

If by some miracle Katee doesn't cancel, then Starby and SwimSpank may actually get to meet Katee. If that's the case, they have promised to pass on my apology for the page on the site where I comment about Katee that "she apparently left her brain at the door that day" (in regards to her internationally televised LittleSpank nickname announcement). There will be no apology for the massive Last Sentinel roasting that Katee cops on this site - she deserves every word of it.

I've also asked Starby to print out my "Sentinel Shame" article and to ask Katee to sign it. That would make my (pathetic, little) world just about complete. I wonder if she'd sign it near the 'side-boob' section. That'd be kinda funny. Or the bit where I suggest that my pooch shags the sofa more enthusiastically than Katee's leading man shagged her in their 'love scene'.

In other 'hard' Katee news, she will be doing 4 epis of the show Nip/Tuck. This sounds like fun, although some of us are frankly relieved it's only 4 epis. Fats is particularly delighted, as by all accounts, Nip/Tuck is quite a racy show, so all things being equal, this should mean that Katee will have to get her gear off and maybe even flash some collarbone. Woohoo!

So Katee, when are you gonna announce a show or movie or something that will give the Spankers cause for celebration? We need some good shit to watch, although we'll still watch the bad shit, if you're in it, cause we have no self-control.

One last thing - there seem to be two fairly regular daily SpankFests these days at the Treehouse. They seem to occur early in the morning US time - like about 10am and around 11pm - midnight. Don't ask me about time zones, but if ya want to work it out, for me, in Sydney, they happen at 3am and about 3pm EST. There are always a whole bunch of Spankers randomly gossiping away, so come and join the fun. The main Katee thread is pretty much random chat interspersed with katee & BSG talk, where the other threads stay pretty strickly on-topic.

Monday, May 12, 2008

Upcoming Katee Interview & Other Crap

POSTED BY:  MaxiSpank
 
SwimSpank has just snerched some interesting news for us - Katee will be appearing on the Jimmy Kimmel show on Friday, May 23. You can get tickets if you'll be around LA then. (Bad luck if you live in Sydney).

A few months ago, Katee appeared on this show and revealed to the world that her nickname was "LittleSpank". Thus, TeamSpank was born. I wonder what pearls of wisdom she'll come out with this time. And I wonder if that Kimmel dude will perve at Katee's tits the whole time, this time around as well. Here's a little refresher...


In other news, there's been a new addition to the Collarbone family. This one is entitled "Mutiny on 'The Ship of Sweaty Arms'". Outstanding.

For the the Treehouse Dwellers, DJ and I have been going nuts adding skins and banners, basically because we are both procratinating about doing things we actually get paid for in the real world. DJ has come up with some great banners for a few of the skins and if you ask nicely , she might add some to the ones that haven't been done yet. The imac skin is a winner. Good times. (You change them in the forum on the bottom left of your screen - there's a little select box).

If you haven't signed up to the TeamSpank Treehouse, it's about time you did. It's the place to be if you are a Katee S fan - there are people there 24/7 gossiping away about Katee and life in general. It's pretty pathetic really. No wonder Katee Sackhoff thinks her fans are a pack of freaks. I often think this to myself and when I get disheartened, I try to remind myself that this is a woman who "loves to gut fish" - then I don't feel quite so creepy. Katee seriously should be in therapy for that sicko little fetish of hers. Fish? Guts? It makes Fats' collarbone thing seem pretty fuckin' pedestrian.

BTW, if you do happen to have some bizarre, sicko Katee Sackhoff fetish, then the Treehouse is definitely the place for you. Someone came in yesterday - a straight married woman with 2 kids - and announced to the rest of us that she had a serious Katee foot fetish. (Strictly barefeet though). She backed this barefoot fetish up with hard photographic evidence. This seemed very run-of-the-mill to the rest of us, who hear riveting stories - on a daily basis - about Katee's 'intense jawline' and perfectly formed collarbone. Not to mention the 'Incredible Inflatable Cleavage' and the 'Magical Expression Zone' between Katee's eyes. Poor Katee Sackhoff, having to deal with sicko freaks like us. Don't judge us harshly Katee - remember you "love to gut fish" and you are a Natalie Portman fan-girl, so you must get it a bit.

Finally, in news of interest to no-one except perhaps my mother, I would like to report that I just removed a blackened and smoky quiche from the oven, that I completely forgot was in it. Doh! My mother is currently spitting blood in my direction, as she wanted to take it to her friend's place for lunch tomorrow. If Teamspank HQ or the Treehouse suddenly ceases to exist, this would be because my mother has murdered me in a fit of burned quiche rage, and I am dead.

Tuesday, May 6, 2008

CBS Doesn't Want to See Katee in CSI!

POSTED BY:  SkySpank
 
According to an article of a French TV magazine, Bruckheimer and CBS bosses refused Katee after her auditions for the new female character in CSI.
Source : TV Magazine

Link
I've tried to translate it for you :


Who'll replace Jorja Fox ?

It's hard to replace Jorja Fox (Sara Sidle) who quit during the last season of CSI. The 2 executive producers, Carol Mendelsohn and Naren Shankar thought they had find gem in the person of Katee Sackhoff, seen in Battlestar Galactica, (according to TV Guide). They admire the actress for years and thought she would be perfect for the new female character, Bryce Adams. Problem : CBS bosses and Jerry Bruckheimer, the creator of the CSI, weren't convinced by Katee's auditions. They refused her.

Sunday, May 4, 2008

Katee Does Dragon

POSTED BY:  MaxiSpank
Geeks all over the net are abuzz today with the news that Katee is confirmed for Dragon Con this year - August 29th to Sept 1, in Atlanta Georgia. Am I supposed to care? I mean, I live in AUSTRALIA. Anyway it's ages off and something better will no doubt come up for Katee to do in the meantime, so she'll probably bail on it.

Why on earth would people want to congregate to celebrate dragons in any case? Dudes, they're NOT REAL. Unless the con geekers are really into Komodo dragons, in which case they should technically call the thing Lizard Con.

BTW, in case you haven't seen it, this site has a new, highly chaotic picture gallery, which now has about 1,200 pics of Katee. Frightening. (The expose thing is offline at the moment 'cause of a technical glitch on our new host).

In case anyone noticed, we've moved to a new server - no need to change your links. (You can now use teamspank.net as well as teamspank.com BTW). We were on our last server - Host Monster- for a total of 9 painful days. Never go there. Their uptime guarantee was 99.9%, to which TeamSpank says 'pffffffffffffff'.

More collarbone and other Katee observations to come in the next few days. I believe Fats is considering doing a probing essay on the parallels between Starbuck/Leoben and Clarice/Hannibal Lecter. Oh and in the TeamSpank Treehouse Forum, there are a bunch of kewl new skins, to which DJ has added some sensational banners. The iMac skin is a real winner. (Change them at the bottom left of the screen).

One last thing - CSI has long been in a rut and coasting, and I'm glad I'm not gonna have to watch it in the future. It's not worthy - of TeamSpank's time or Katee Sackhoff's.

Katee does a con